April 4, Synchronici-tea Game

1. Get 10 teacups.
2. Distribute them in your home,
according to your own tastes,
but put one in your window.
3. Pick up a hammer on your way to work.
4. Smash your boss’ car window.
5. Smash your boss’ office window.
6. Smash your boss’ face windows
and teeth
and knees
and Windows phone.
7. Drop the hammer on your way out
(if it hits a security guard on its way down,
it hits a security guard on its way down).
8. Go home and wait for the police to arrive.
9. Invite them in for a cup of tea.
10. Score yourself based on
the amount of police officers
that break through your window,
or drink your tea.

March 5, Chewing Game

1. Buy an exquisite piece of veal.
2. Marinate it in red wine and tears.
3. Rub salt and pepper into your arm pits.
4. Put the meat in a blender and leave it on when you head off for work.
5. Go for a swim.
6. Go to your regular lunch place.
7. Order a steak.
8. Bite me.

January 21, Employment Game

1. Clap your hands and stomp your feet.
2. Smile big and smile often.
3. Turn around so I can get a good look at you.
4. Add these numbers.
5. Shred these papers.
6. Write this game.
7. Kill these people.
8. Take this money.
9. Come back tomorrow.
10. Lose, lose, lose, lose, lose!