May 25, Scout Game

1. Wait until you’re 34 years old
to earn your first scout badge.
2. Dig a hole in the middle of a soccer field.
3. Drop the badge in the hole.
4. Drop a dead rat in the hole.
5. Drop a live scorpion in the hole.
6. Drop a bag of fireworks in the hole.
7. Drop a gallon of gasoline in the hole.
8. Start a fire.
9. Earn another scout badge.
10. Level up.

April 8, Bass Game

1. Get yourself one hell of a fishing rod.
2. Go fishing.
3. Keep an eye on the line.
4. While you wait,
think about your long gone childhood days.
5. While you wait,
think about all you’ve loved and lost.
6. While you wait,
think about the tears you wish you never held back.
7. Catch the fish.
8. Beat it upside the head with something blunt;
a stick, a joke, or a… blunt.
9. Find some people who really like to party.
10. Drop dat phat bass, yo!

April 4, Synchronici-tea Game

1. Get 10 teacups.
2. Distribute them in your home,
according to your own tastes,
but put one in your window.
3. Pick up a hammer on your way to work.
4. Smash your boss’ car window.
5. Smash your boss’ office window.
6. Smash your boss’ face windows
and teeth
and knees
and Windows phone.
7. Drop the hammer on your way out
(if it hits a security guard on its way down,
it hits a security guard on its way down).
8. Go home and wait for the police to arrive.
9. Invite them in for a cup of tea.
10. Score yourself based on
the amount of police officers
that break through your window,
or drink your tea.